... I thought I'd play it safe and not get beat up and take my red-and-gold ass to Belle's house for civilized game-watching with healthy snacks.
(See? We can all be friends!)
And even though the Niners lost (and yes, I was the only Niners fan there), the game was good, and we all had fun watching it (especially the part where Goodwin tried to run the ball and it was amazing and lumbering and hilarious) and eating salad and drinking root beer. (I know, right? We were sober and we ate vegetables! Hardcore.)
And I thought: Wow, football can be nice and polite with no shit-talking, hooray!
And then the dog decided to try to bite me in the face, and now my right eyelid is slightly swollen and my eyeball kind of hurts and I hope I put the ice bag on in time to keep a black eye at bay.
So much for not getting beat up today.
Also: This is why I have cats.