Monday, April 13, 2015

I need a mental health day

I recently went from this ...

Red is the color of shame. And also a lot of wine.

... to this.


It's been great -- I really don't feel like myself unless I'm training -- but absolutely exhausting. I spent a good portion of my weekend on the bike. On Saturday there were hill repeats (which, by the way, are my least favorite activity ever, except for maybe spending all afternoon barfing in an airport) ...

Pain never looked so pretty.

... followed by a swim. Then yesterday brought a 2.5-hour ride with a transition run.

Don't worry. This wasn't a permanent fashion choice.

As a result, I've had such horrible post-workout brain fog that on Saturday when I finished the ride, I packed my bike, left my Garmin on the roof of my car and drove off. Thankfully, I realized what I had done and went back, and by some miracle, a random cyclist found my watch on the side of the road ("The sun was shining right on it!" he said) and gave it back to me.

And since I'm apparently too dumb to learn from my mistakes (insert dating joke here), after yesterday's workout, I went to the tri store to buy Skratch and a new cassette (went from 12-25 to 11-28 because have I mentioned how much I hate hills and dear god, please bring on the cheater gear), got work done on my bike, packed it in the car and drove off. Two hours later, the woman from the tri store called to tell me I had left the Skratch and my old cassette in the parking lot. 

Dear lord.

Monday, April 06, 2015

pull my zipper

So I got a new wetsuit.


And I spent a good portion of my evening attempting to try it on but failing miserably.

The downside of having three cats as roommates (besides cleaning up their poop and vomit all the time and chasing them with a spray bottle while yelling "No!"): There's no one to zip up your brand-new wetsuit for you. Which makes it really hard when you can't figure out if the wetsuit is too small or if you just didn't put it on right.

My lower back kind of hurts now from my unsatisfying solo zipper-pulling efforts.

(And yes, I wrote that sentence that way on purpose.)

Wait, it gets better.


This is the part where I cut off my feet and wait for the search party to find me, right?

And you wonder why I don't have my pro card.

Sunday, April 05, 2015

happy easter indeed

Best Easter ever. I woke up and there was no cat puke next to the bed. And then I took Muppet for a ride outdoors in the sun. And then I met Annie for brunch and ate spicy pork sausage congee.

I may or may not have still been wearing padded shorts during this.

And then I spent time with my boss's family.




Don't worry. My boss's family consists of human beings. His mom just happens to have the most epic collection of creepy dolls I have ever seen in my entire life. In other words, she is my hero.

Also, I colored a cow.



And ate a ton of post-Easter dinner truffle fries because it makes complete sense to polish off a giant holiday meal and then immediately go out and eat more food.

Epitome of maturity.

I just hope my boss still lets me hang out with his family even after I told his 8-year-old son about how people sometimes have a growth on their arm and when they go to the doctor to get it removed, they find hair and teeth inside because -- dun dun dun ! -- it was their secret twin.