day 3 of this nonsense

Saturday, June 13, 2015

According to the post-surgery care literature, I am supposed to be experiencing "peak swelling" right now.

I woke up this morning like this:


Pretty sure my upper lip is trying to eat the rest of my face.

I spent the day moving through a cycle of force-feeding myself mushy foods, taking meds, rinsing my mouth with warm salt water, icing my face and then passing out from exhaustion.

I miss when my food didn't look like diarrhea.

Also, when you have to puree all of your meals, you end up with a lot of dishes. And consuming enough protein is kind of a challenge. And seriously, I just really want Doritos.

At least I still have my sense of humor.

Anyway, in case you are not totally sick of hearing absolutely everything about my surgery, this is what's in my mouth now:

I am telling everyone I got screwed.

My friends have been so supportive about the whole experience.

Apparently, we all have the same brain.

And this is what I look like without my denture:

Totally the next Lara Stone. Right? RIGHT??!

My friend Brian thinks I should start wearing an MMA hat and telling people I lasted five minutes with Ronda Rousey

1 comment:

Cathryn said...

So I am late to the tooth party, and it took me 5 blog posts to work out what had happened. Oh my word. You should gave heard my son's 'What is THAT???" when he saw the denture! And I laughed so hard at your white-trash toothless photo (can I say white-trash? Being British, I'm never sure of whether or not I'm being un-PC in America).

You poor poor thing. I hope you're mending okay.

 
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