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| This is my life now. |
It's either snowing or so cold that the highs are sub-zero and windchill is like -20. This wasn't a big deal last year, when I lived in a towering apartment building with indoor parking, a gym, and a lap pool. But then I had to go get married and become an adult and now I have no luxury amenities and have to park outside and shovel a driveway. (Life lesson: Don't grow up.)
And my car hates this weather and won't start. Yes, friends, Wally the Mazda has decided he's 100 percent Californian and F this shit. Which made for fun logistics this weekend when I had a run off the bike, but couldn't run outside because frostbite, but couldn't go to the gym because Wally was protesting winter.
Wait, it gets better.
You know what else is awesome about winter? Frozen barf. In mid-December, someone puked in the snow along the walkway to work. And because the snow has not melted, it is still there. It's like a permanently installed pinkish stain of disgustingness. And I see it every single day, sometimes multiple times if I decide to walk somewhere for lunch. And as some of you know, I have this total vomit phobia where I am just absolutely unnaturally terrified of other people's puke, so every time I walk past the frozen barf, I imagine it reaching out for me and pelting me in the face like a tiny horrible snowball.
Oh my god, is it spring yet?
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