friday things

Friday, August 10, 2012

Started sorting through the drawer full of business cards I've amassed over the last seven or so years spent working in wine.

Included in that pile: Two "Top Chef" contestants (pre-fame), two writers who are no longer alive, a number of now-defunct restaurants (remember Mosaic in Forestville?) and a woman who bummed a ride off of me after a documentary shoot at my previous winery and subsequently taught me the meaning of "cougar." (She was part of the crew, so I felt like as the PR girl, I had to say yes. I ended up driving her into San Francisco and dropping her off at her boyfriend's house. When he came outside to greet her, I learned he was a college kid and a good 15 years younger. The whole situation was really, really weird. Also, she was kind of batshit crazy.)

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I'm over the whole deer-so-cute-and-friendly thing.

Why? My tomato plants are missing limbs, thanks to this guy:


I've caught him in my yard three times now. Yesterday, when I came home from masters swim, we stared at each other. And then he made the most graceful, effortless leap over the fence, looked at me one more time and took a giant shit.

I see how it is, Mr. Buck. This is war.

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Recent exchange with Matt about Sunday's half marathon (which I am totally not prepared for, by the way):

Me: Are you going to fart on me again while we're running?

Him: Definitely.

The problem: This time around, I don't have enough kick to pass him, so I'll be stuck in a cloud of fart. Great.

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